Love anew

At some point, everyone has to move on from something. School, Careers, Phases....Some things are much harder to move on from than others. My marriage ended in June 2014. The reasons are not going to be written about. But it was tough, mother of two turned single mother of two over night. It did take a while, but one day, it just clicked that I didn't need to mope anymore, there was no need for being forlorn and feeling sorry for myself and I met someone new relatively quickly, I know that sounds bad but I am finally happy. 

So, how do you move on?

1. Remember that everyone moves on in different ways, some people go off the rails and some people take their time and move on quietly and on their own. However you personally feel the need to move on is up to you and nobody can tell you that you are wrong. (Unless moving on involves murdering your ex partner, please refrain from this).

2. Give yourself time. Don't go rushing into a new relationship straight after ending your current. Granted, this does go well for some people. But try to take a few months to be by yourself and re-discover yourself as a person. 

3. Keep busy. Get a hobby, focus on friends, children if you have them. It will honestly be much easier to move on if you keep your mind off of it. I soon forgot that I was even sad by keeping myself occupied.

4. If children are involved then please please please, do not belittle or talk bad about your ex partner in front of them. As tempting as it may be, refrain from forcing your own opinions onto your children, it is their parent after all and they are entitled to have a relationship with them, regardless of your opinion. All too often I see parents bitching about the other to each other, this only confuses children and makes a hard situation even harder for them. They shouldn't have to choose sides. 

5. Be fair. Regardless of what has happened, if you have a house shared together that you have both put time and money into, they both deserve an equal share, it is far better to sort that between yourselves than go through another route.

6. Try not to dwell on things. During a break up, a lot of things are said or done that you will end up regretting, I highly suggest just letting them go. Whats the point in keeping in grudges? It only makes things harder when you are forced communicate. 

I am lucky enough to have met someone that has taken on my children like they are his own, I cannot fault him. He is honestly one of the most generous men I have ever met and I didn't know that I could be this happy. We have already had such amazing adventures together since we met and I hope that we have many many more.