Monday, 21 April 2014

My awful birth experience

(Warning: May gross some people out, also very long)
Where to start?
The first thing I can say is, Wowee. It's been a tough week. Last Friday, I woke up and was surprised to waters had broken whilst I was asleep, panic stations! Dan was due home that day thank goodness, so I phoned my Mum and it was a good job she urged me to go to the hospital because I honestly thought I had just wet myself in my sleep. The hospital confirmed that my waters were indeed leaking and that I would be having Daisy-Mae soon, they told me to go home and wait for labor to start, if it didn't then I should go back the next morning to be induced. What followed was both very traumatic and very horrific for me, it might not seem that way to readers but I can honestly say, I have been put off ever having anymore children. 

My contractions started early evening, they weren't very strong, barely even painful and didn't progress, not even as I pottered around mcdonalds and home getting my stuff ready. I was asked to go in to hospital on Saturday, 12th April to be induced, but since I was already contracting a little, they popped a pessary in my....noo-nah and I received some fairly painful tummy aches in return. This is apparently because it makes your cervix soften. So, lots of pain..contractions had stopped. By the time Sunday morning came, I was tired, frustrated, in pain and they barely even checked on me, I felt bottom priority, despite being three weeks early and the fact that my waters had now been leaking for over two days (Dangerous chance of infection). After a whole day of waiting, watching all the other mothers be moved on to have their babies, I was finally called in for induction at 1.00pm, by 1.30pm the cannula was in and contractions had started mildly, I was only 1-2 centimetres dilated and within an hour, I was in a lot of pain. By 4.00pm I asked for Gas and Air and they kept on turning up the dosage of syntocinon and although being instructed not to turn it above 24, they didn't listen and cranked it up to 40, this is where things got horrendous. The pain I felt, was nothing I had experienced before, with Skye, I breezed through labor and didn't make a sound. My mum says she can't stop thinking about the screaming and that she will have nightmares about it for a very long time. Daniel was so upset that he had to leave the room for a little while to calm himself down. They didn't offer me any other pain relief than the gas and air, which eventually had no effect and I spent the next 6 hours screaming, being told to stand up to help things along (Which is difficult to do when you can't stand the pain). After 10 hours of agony, I found out I was only 4cm dilated and I cried and cried and cried at my Mum that I couldn't physically take anymore, it was incredibly traumatic for me. They finally offered me an emergency cesarean and needless to say I just wanted it over with. 

The cesarean was a very strange experience. They numb your body through your spine from the chest down, literally like being paralyzed. You stay awake during a cesarean and I had no idea they had even started, until she said, ''Nearly through the womb''. The surgeons were absolutely lovely to both me and Dan. I felt some tugging, Dan said when he looked, they were pulling and stretching my stomach quite violently, which would explain why I feel so bruised. Finally we heard a cry and they asked Dan to cut the cord. I couldn't hold Daisy-Mae, because my arm had also gone numb and I ended up smacking her in the face, so Dan held her near to me so we could have skin to skin contact. 

So, the next morning I was very upset, tired and very very very sore. Traumatized seems like such a dramatic word and it only got worse. Dan went home with my Mum at 10 in the morning to have some sleep and whilst he was gone...Daisy-Mae stopped breathing properly, she went blue and it was the scariest moment of my life, when I buzzed for the nurse, they didn't talk, they just...took her away to intensive care and left me waiting. It took them until 9.00pm to tell us that we could see her and to move me into a room of my own away from the other mothers and babies. 

When we got to the NICU, Daisy-Mae had tubes and wires and drips hanging out of her and I just burst into tears, I've never seen Dan cry....and he broke down, which made me worse. So for four days, we just...waited, I expressed breast milk for her and finally had a cuddle and changed her nappy until she was allowed back in with me. I can't imagine how parents of even poorlier children cope, because it was the hardest four days ever. I did get told off once or twice because ''A cesarean is major surgery! You should be resting, not walking around here all the time! You need to take care of yourself too!'' How could I possibly rest? Knowing that my baby was in that incubator all alone? 

Finally, we are home. I am on a ton of pills because during the week in hospital, I became anaemic and my blood pressure rocketed to dangerous levels, I also have to inject myself with blood thinner and have a lot of painkillers due to the surgery. Daisy-Mae is 5lbs12oz and was born at 2.40am on 14th April 2014.

BUT, despite the week we had, we are finally home, safe and sound with our gorgeous children. I have to rest for 6 weeks (Impossible). Skye is ecstatic to have such a gorgeous baby sitter and she is going to be a great big sister. 


  1. So precious, she's beautiful! I'm sorry you had such a traumatic experience, but hopefully all will be forgotten when you're having cuddles with Daisy-Mae. All the best for you and your family!


    1. Thank you sweetheart. We are very glad to be home safe and sound! xx

  2. Wow what a story, it sounds utterly traumatic for you. It makes me realise how straight forward my labour actually was. I can't imagine anything scarier than my little one stopping breathing and I think you and your partner are so strong for handling it all so well. I'm glad you're back at home with both your little ladies now and things can only get better.
    With such a tough labour you're set for a speedy recovery and a relaxed baby! I'm the opposite, where I had a relatively easy labour and recovery I've now got mastitis and a bubba who doesn't want to be put down lol

    Thanks for sharing :) xxx